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Plump Up The Volume

by Composted

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    Congratulations! You are the proud new owner of Composted's first full length album Plump Up The Volume in the highest quality form of digital media. Side effects may include: diarrhea, headaches, erections lasting more than 4 hours, anal leakage, vomiting, tears, and more diarrhea. Sorry, no refunds.
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1.
2.
A/S/L: 19/Female/In your dreams, baby IRL: 40/Male/At your window, maybe? LOL! OMG, WTF? Show me your dick on A.I.M. or ChatRoulette I’m logged on to get off Trollin’ for Hogan, show me your cock Wife and kids are sound asleep It’s time for daddy to creep I get hard when you think I’m wet Posing as a nymphette on the net I’m a boy-crazy tranny shogun Don’t say a word, just make with the Hogan Hey baby, do you wanna cyber? You can find me on AdultFriendFinder You boys are so naïve; I’m gettin’ nudes with the greatest of ease Silly goose, if you only knew I grew up with your mother and father And now I’m baiting you With semi-nude pictures of my daughter I can’t wait to witness the look in your eyes When an overweight, middle-aged, balding cross-dresser arrives Oooh baby I’mma break yo dick off Oooh baby I’mma buttah yo bread I’ll use your tears as lube Tonight you’re sleeping in papa’s bed
3.
Life ain’t easy on the upper west side Art openings, limos, wine and cheese, bitch please My socialite girlfriend is constantly bitching for cash But I’d spend it all for that gorgeous pink gash She only cares about fashion trends but when I knocked her up She feared her posh existence would end Seven months pregnant, she pummeled her womb With Apple-tini’s and blow till our baby went boom. Our private doctor said it was prenatal child abuse So I showed him my steel, since his services were no longer of use God, she loved our dead kin’s supple skin, and damn she needed a new purse So she flayed off its skin, let the sewing begin; I guess I can cancel that hearse. Infant leather made one hell of a bag And soon my bitch’s purse was in high demand. Cityscapes full of cosmetic surgery-ruined whores Were now flaunting my child’s remnants down the runway floors Bitches spending all their cash on dead infant handbags Every four months my girlfriend was self-aborting our lineage Pumping herself with fertility drugs and snow had really begun to take its toll The day I found her dead, an idea popped into my head: Human leather high heels, the most luscious pairs For the highest bidding NYC cunt millionaires
4.
I went down to a hardcore show to slug some beers and bother chicks I don’t know. But as soon as I hit the dance floor I saw more fruity kids flailing around than at a Kanye West show I miss the thrills of impending danger Kids these days pit like they’re the fucking Pink Ranger Are my fucking eyes deceiving me? Whatever happened to honor and unity? This karate kid shit has turned my sight red I’m about to rearrange more faces than a Mr. Potato Head I went down to a hardcore show Smashing High Life and spitting game to strange hoes And sure enough the next thing you know I got their skinny boyfriends throwing limp wrists Like I’m someone to be fucked with I miss the thrills of impending danger Kids these days pit like they’re the fucking Pink Ranger And for my honor, for my pride; I’m not just gonna kick your ass I’ll abduct your girlfriend, carve out her hot pocket and dip it in brass So you can call me crazy or quick to overreact, but I’m still coming full force And with your girls twat you’ll be whacked Brass Moose Knuckles are coming your way You fucked with me now it’s time to pay I got your girl’s fish flaps fastened to my fists Blunt force cunnilingus split your lips with her lips (x2) Once I pluck the sweet meats next to your girl’s anus I’m molding moose knuckles into weapons quite heinous Cold blooded psycho wielding pussies dipped in brass In the hierarchy of foul vengeance I’m at the top of the class (x2) Went back to that hardcore show Exacting vengeance the only way that I know I just turned these kids’ faces into fucking ground beef With a brass set of sex organs no longer able to queef
5.
BB(W)Q 04:18
Obese woman: 400 lbs. Too many Twinkies, she’s trapped in her house Stuffing her face with deliveries from town Her ungodly appearance makes many dicks frown She eats enough food to feed an entire family Couch sores on her skin must be peeled daily Daytime talk shows and Parliament cigarettes Welfare and disability checks pay the rent She admires the lifestyles of the rich and famous Yet she lives the lifestyle of the obese and heinous She eats enough food to feed an entire family Couch sores on her skin must be peeled daily Fused to her sofa by rotten flesh gravy Tube-tied to oxygen because she’s too fucking lazy Late at night she passes out with a cigarette While watching reruns of Cheers The cherry falls down and hits the shag carpet And everything goes Bad News Bears Flames flow like water, the curtains ablaze Knick-knacks, midnight snacks melt within the haze Floral print coffin lights up like a match Wood panel walls melt to the white trash The rafters give way, mashing the spud Fiery embers are boiling her blood Dying eyes locked onto the TV set Obese woman now charred human sludge The rafters give way, mashing the spud Melting like salt snowing on slugs Her final screams muffled by molten lard The scent of her flesh attracts ravenous ‘tards Hunger pangs tear at her jellyrolls Fat cells drip out from various holes BB(W)Q, no blood left to spill The tables have turned now that you’re on the grill Fire consumes the oxygen tank Metal heats fast, peeling the paint Morphed from couchdaver to gelatinous blob Propelled by gas and cheap alcohol She blasts through air like jiggly napalm Like Santa’s sleigh attached to an A-bomb Splitting to pieces like a falling star Into kiddie pools full of famished retards Mongoloids swarm and target their stew Devouring chunks whole, struggling to chew Hording leftovers in their bathing suits Morbid hunger sated by fat fuck barbecue
6.
OB/GYN O.G. 04:30
I got more bitches than puppy mills and I don’t even keep em’ high They see me smile and think, “Damn, what a nice guy” They text me late, drunk, cryin’ ‘bout they boyfriend I know he never takes you out boo, I understand He never licks you downstairs and that’s a crying shame He’s to blame, like Bon Jovi givin’ love a bad name But I’m like Alice In Chains, cuz I’ll get Down In A Hole I like to grease up the gears before I slide in my pole So next time your man’s out with his weak ass clique, hit me up And you can suck on a real man’s dick It’s Big Ev bitch you know me – all your girlfriends call me OB/GYN O.G. I’ll never buy you flowers or tell you that I’m in love But I’ll rip you out ya clothes and fill you up with no glove I tell you you’re special; you think that I mean unique But I mean the kind of special reserved for kids with Velcro shoes on their feet You can feel the boom-bap when my balls slap ya butthole Now we’re burning shit down just like Great White pyro-techno Technically you’ve never been fucked before Because your boyfriend’s got less dick than a lesbian porn And now I got ya pussy hurtin’ from squirtin’ ovum from your piss curtains I’m rocking a vibrating cock ring and a solid gold merkin And yes to me you’re a bog of eternal stench – you wench Soon to be stained with my white funk like a fucking Boston common park bench. So forget the swinging 70’s--it’s 2013, and no I don’t need an ID Who gives a fuck if you’re eighteen? And just because I mainly bang top-ranked eagles Doesn’t mean you won’t get it if you resemble a beagle. No doubt homie, you should hide your sister, hide your wife Because you might pay the bills but I’m the love of their life So if you’re into some girl don’t bring her out to a show Because I’ll spit on the mic and then I’ll spit on her holes. Even if she got a mouth like a New England longshoreman I’ll leave her thighs more dented than the god Lamont Coleman Big ass, big lips and fat titties I know she’s your girl but I fucked her what a pity. (x2) It’s Big Ev bitch you know me – all your girlfriends call me OB/GYN O.G. I’ll never buy you flowers or tell you that I’m in love But I’ll rip you out ya clothes and fill you up with no glove I tell you you’re special; you think that I mean unique But I mean the kind of special reserved for kids with Velcro shoes on their feet
7.
Yes, my life is shit; I got fired from the Spritz--a water park so nice and clean They really detested my acts obscene. I really loved that place and now I’m such a waste. I may as well go back there and take my life Got my sunscreen, got my knife Yes, my life is shit, but once I was so pure Until I pounded in your kiddies’ chlorine drenched turds Pushed I’m sliding down, where everybody knew my name, I’m sliding down Open a main vein on the slide called “Geronimo!” Last breath obscene, final inhale of black tar and speed Your kids are stunned when they’re blasted with hep-c piss And rotten blood from a former water park employee turned suicidal thug
8.
Since the day that she was born, daddy planned to put her in porn Blanket made of bondage straps, dildos dangling from mobiles Barbie was replaced with Bimbo Bettie the blow-up dolly All key components for daddy’s girl to learn her calling Older sister cast aside, traded in for fresh new flesh Abandoned child bride; the tires have lost their tread She did the only thing she knew how to do She went to school to recruit a group of tiny prostitutes Oh father dear Your mini-slut in training Became jealous of all the balls Sister’s lips were draining A pseudo-sadistic statistic slinging spooge through the family tree A petty pimp prompting progeny to perform in pornography Big sis got out of line, and took the profit for herself This can’t go on, it’s time to put that bitch’s head on a shelf They have a recipe for a tasty treat Eliminate the competition directly from the streets Bake them into pastries; let them rot in swollen guts Sever the suction pumps; the little sluts to star in snuff $1 for a rimjob, or cruller laced with baby How about kiddy cannoli? Cherub biscuits soaked in gravy? Toddler cobbler baked by a mad pedomaniac Sold in dozens from the back of his Pontiac He’d never see jail if he bargained with the judge He’s got a sweet tooth for the taste of infant sludge Behold the American Wet Dream Little angels giving head in the back of the bus Behold the American Wet Dream Grade school girls vag-azzling their muffs Pop stars teaching toddlers to flaunt their tits Kids these days have gone straight to shit
9.
When my sausage factory closed, all of my workers lost their homes And as the economy fell on its back, I blew my life savings on whores and crack So I joined my ex-employees under the bridge where they taught me The art of huffing fermented shit, and the day I made my own body waste batch, An immaculate hobo savior was hatched Chorus: I am your God – Adorn me with sausages I am your lord – Go forth find sausages Indeed my jenkum showed my workers the light, so they followed my orders And robbed butcher shops at night A cardboard box was no temple for a rotten shit messiah So they built me a sausage altar to receive my sacramental doo-doo jambalaya. (Chorus) Breathe deep my heavenly slop My corporate life I had failed; addiction gripped me, all hope had sailed Good karma kicked in; my pain had passed When sweet brown communion sprung forth from my ass When I became constipated, my congregation fell to their knees And prayed for a movement on seagull foot rosary beads But as the months passed and I approached death, My loyal followers said, “Fuck it” And switched over to meth. Abandoned – Forgotten – Betrayed – Begotten (Chorus)
10.
My dick is sick--it looks like shit, but you’ll suck me off you crazy bitch The time has come; the time is now--sore cock snack time for a rancid sow She’s past the point of giving a fuck about protection. Chorus: “What the fuck’s a condom?!” I just said I don’t want them Only if you’re dripping with STDs will I drop to my knees Well you can call me “Make A Wish” you lucky fucking nasty bitch She’s grinning wide from ear to ear; it’s time to make a world premier Out comes my pud, raw and clotted with blood This nasty slag just fucking fell in love She whips out her breasts and her rank pubic nest Even though my messmaker’s like a Mama Celeste. (Chorus) She sucks, she blows, she ain’t light on her toes How she stomachs me no one fucking knows She’s the queen of yeast and I’m a horrid beast But together we have found a depraved sexual peace
11.
Compact bodies, laid out on cots and floor mats Rise painfully out of naptime coma from spiked Snack Packs Blood-curdling screams engulf the facility “I want my mommy! Where’s my binky?!” Mary had a class of darling, little lambs The most precious group of angels They say, “You only hurt the ones you love” And these kids got straight fucking mangled. Her teeth were rotten from years of crystal meth addiction, So she put herself on a not-so-gentle dental mission. The storybooks and fables finally cracked Miss Mary Mentally transforming her into the tooth fairy Equipped with crates of 101 proof homemade whiskey Mary snuck into the daycare before dawn one morning The fridge presented a plentiful plethora of pudding So she peeled back the seals and started pouring The hours leading to the feeding began fleeting Anticipation growing for inebriation and unconscious snoring At snack time they slurped and slurped away Pounding pudding cups like Jell-O shots They staggered, stumbled, swaggered and swayed Shit-house drunk, passed out on Teletubby cots And so they sleep; 2.3 B.A.C. And so she creeps, pliers pulling baby teeth And so she flees, to turn trashed tikes’ teeth into jewelry And so she’ll reap profits of daycare dentistry Trails of bracelets constructed of incisors and bicuspids Led investigators to the basement of the culprit Jars of molars from the jaws of Pre-K scholars Lined the walls of her dank, dark, mildewed cellar And now Miss Mary the Meth-Mouthed Tooth Fairy Will spend the rest of her life lusting for teeth behind bars

credits

released April 14, 2015

Evan - Vocals
Mark - Guitar/Vocals
Tim - Bass
Mike - Drums

All music written by Composted
Additional lead & rhythm guitar by Eliot "The Blackness Monster" Bayless

Engineered, Mixed & Produced by Eliot Bayless at 37' Productions in Rockland, MA between February 2013 and May 2014

Mastered by Rob Gonnella & Nick Zampiello at New Alliance East in Cambridge, MA in June 2014

Released by Ossuary Industries in CD format 4/14/15

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